Emotional changes

As the physical changes of weight loss are definitely noticeable, the emotional changes are not so much. I know that I have been more intolerant of people since I have loss so much weight. There are days I hate myself the more weight I lose. I look into the mirror and see the women who gave birth to me looking back at me. The women who could never keep friends, was always using people to get ahead and never anything nice to say about anyone unless it got her something. The only she ever loved was money. She was the most abusive, nasty and destructive person I have ever known.

I keep telling myself I am not her, that I am nothing like her, but that is not as convincing as it us to be. Maybe I was using the weight to hide from her and the fact that she gave me half my DNA. I can hope that when I reach my goal that I am not the person that she abused, both verbally and physically, but one that will come to realize that she is no longer worth my energy. I am not what she wanted to be, I am more and that is something I have to keep remembering.